Squid



Squid
https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/scrungus/images/2/28/SQUIDSGHOSTmusical3.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/310?cb=20170504202356

=== Species === Skeleton

=== Affiliation === N/A

=== Status === Deceased

=== Aliases === N/A Squid is the ghost of a skeleton of unknown origins that inhabited the universe of 5CR56-Beta. Known for his easily-annoyed temperament and perpetually being trapped on a phone with a person that can be assumed is the source of such an irritable personality, Squid is best regarded as more of an anomaly than a character.

Squid is a vengeful ghost who seeks revenge against the Asswagons, who killed him during illegal production of hentai of the aforementioned group.

History
Squid's origins remain unclear, along with many other facts surrounding him. Details were nebulous at best, though it can be assumed Squid's presence in 5CR56-Beta was not unnatural and that other skeletons of his kind roam throughout the universe, as he was often payed no mind when on a commute to his next place of work before it's inevitable destruction, and was not the central subject of any cults, religions, or any other organizations.

Squid has run into Scrungus, Spicoceles, and Uncle Miguel on numerous occasions due to what appears to be bad luck, and has had irritating experiences and aggravating interactions with them each time.

Death
At some point, Squid somehow managed to acquire the resources to manufacture illegal hentai, featuring artistic renditions of Spicoceles and Scrungus "getting their brains fucked out". The Asswagons soon cracked down on Squid's illegal ecchi printing scheme and killed the skeleton for his heresy. However, the Manky Collective had gotten ahold of several copies of the manga before it was forcibly cancelled by the Asswagons, and - after censoring the images appropriately, using transparent .pngs of Mankies - leaked it to the 5CR56-Beta net for the world to see, in a pointless attempt to slander the Asswagons.

Squid soon managed to ressurect himself as a spectre through sheer force of anger, and set out into the galaxy to forever haunt the Asswagons as retribution.

Appearance
Squid resembled a typical human skeleton, of a slightly decayed yellowish hue, and with the ability to move without the aid of muscles, ligaments, or other tissues. Squid was notably always covered in various cobwebs, the cause of which is unknown. Attempts to brush them off only yielded more cobwebs in their place.

Squid was never seen without a black phone on his person, and the skeleton was often pre-occupied with an apparently unceasing conversation on said phone. The model of phone is apparently nebulous, changing from appearance to appearance and occasionally even shot-to-shot.

When Squid was assassinated by the Asswagons, his spirit remained after death and dedicated itself to eternally tormenting the Asswagons on their quests. This spectral form appears to be Squid's severed head, with slinky eyes dangling out of the eye sockets, and the skull itself being capable of flight and perpetually consumed by purple fire. His phone is now spiritually connected to his form, and follows Squid around at all times.

Abilities

 * Misfortune - Squid is clearly subject to immense cases of bad luck; the poor skeleton has on numerous occasions come into contact with troglodytes such as Scrungus, Spicoceles, Uncle Miguel, and scores of other annoyances. Whenever Squid finds a new job out in the cosmos and moves to a new planet or location to begin working an office job there, it is guaranteed a Manky fleet will coincidentally arrive to glass the planet within an hour at least and a month at most.
 * Clinical Depression - The entity known as Squid despises itself, and is capable of weaponizing this crippling depression and self-loathing, projecting an aura of self-hatred that affects anything caught within it's radius.
 * Persistence - Squid's sheer anger was enough to cause his skeletal soul to persist after death, becoming a spectre of sorrow who would go on to haunt the Asswagons during their adventures.

Personality
Squid displays little of his outward personality on account of never having time to do so. His spectre appears to be an animalistic and mindless creature, which communicates solely in enraged shrieks.

Relationships

 * Scrungus - Squid is disgusted by Scrungus the least, but is unaware that his mechanical body hides a horrific visage beneath it's large green eyes.
 * Spicoceles - Squid harbors a particular hatred for the Maker of Memes, knowing it was he who landed the killing blow in the raid on his hentai factory.
 * Uncle Miguel - Though Miguel had no part in the raid on Squid's hentai factory, Squid is disgusted by Miguel the most due to newfound knowledge of his involvement in underground loli markets.
 * ??? - A mysterious entity appeared to be holding an endless, perpetual conversation with Squid over the nebulous black phone the skeleton carried with him at all times. This entity complained in a shrill voice without end (aside from breaks at certain times of the day), seemingly over nothing. Why Squid could not simply hang up on this entity remains a mystery.
 * ?????????? - Another entity over Squid's phone appears to have taken the prior entity's place since Squid's demise. It is unclear whether this entity is even self-aware or sentient, as the only sound it produces is an endless distorted didgeridoo noise, which serves as a herald of Squid's presence.
 * Other bitches - He don't know em

Heresy
Leaked and censored pages from Squid's illegally manufactured Asswagon hentai manga copies, courtesy of the Manky Collective.